Apologies, people of the internet.

Dear My Readers,

Stuffed OliveI’m sorry I haven’t been blogging so frequently lately. Unfortunately the world has conspired to make me ridiculously busy with stupid things like work. I know, I know. How boring is that? Sadly, I have to eat, and in order to do so, I must earn money.  I’d like to say I can live off inspiration and beauty, but I’m not a Hallmark card.

I promise to return to the blogosphere in full force as soon as possible. After all, eating is largely overrated, unless you are eating quinoa chocolate, and then it can never be rated highly enough.

In the meantime, I’d like to introduce you to George.

Love,

Stuffed Olive.

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The Story of a Pygmy Ladybug who wanted to be a Monkey.

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George Stewart lived in deepest, darkest Peru. He was, however, not a bear, nor was he particularly fond of marmalade sandwiches. George was a pygmy ladybug.

Strictly speaking, George knew there was no such thing as a pygmy ladybug, but being small for his age, he decided adding “pygmy” to his title was sure to help him make it into the cool group.

George was not the smartest bug in the cluster.

Aside from his propensity for stupidity, George was also known around the forest for his obsessive jealousy of monkeys.

“It’s all about the opposable thumb,” George told his friend Marcus. “Imagine if we had opposable thumbs!”

Marcus poked at an aphid on his plate “But George, we don’t need opposable thumbs. Anyway, we can fly.”

“True,” said George, not entirely listening but wondering which apps he would install on his iPhone, should his dream of opposable thumbs eventuate.

Author: Stuffed Olive

My awesomeness intimidates some people, others just point and laugh.

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8 Comments

  1. On a completely unrelated note to anything except awesomeness, I bought this mug yesterday and I suspect it might be the best thing in the whole world ever.

    cat_mug

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    • Thanks Steph!!! #mosthappymakingcommentever
      *runs around in a circle squealing “weeee”*

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    • Thanks, Sean, and YEAH! Totally! Who needs it!

      (But really, I love you my Facebook readers… and also, Facebook gods, please don’t smite me.)

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  2. Love love love. So funny
    (Also love you and hate the Universe for its evil conspiring against you). But, food is NEVER over rated. Really. i mean this from a nutritional standpoint, but also as a person who buys love with baked goods and tried to run a food blog for a milisecond.

    Hope you have plenty of quinona chocolate

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  3. What on earth is quinoa chocolate? I need to know! It sounds magical, combining the nutritious super powers of quinoa with the deliciousness of chocolate. Please tell me I’m right!

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